No more Ici!!

That would translate out to be Binky. :)

So I am so sick of hearing the phrase from my son "Iwan Ici!" Or just "ici" in a small quiet voice because he knows it isnt bedtime or naptime...that I finally decided Binky's life needed to come to an end. LOL...Our dear binky's life was finally complete on saturday morning. Well...he had little bit of a drawn out death, but he is finally dead. LOL. Ok...so saturday morning, after Taysen requested his binky one too many times by only 10 o'clock in the morning, no where near naptime, I went in the other room when he wasnt looking and cut off the tip to his beloved bink. :O At first I was a little nervous, scared, then a little mad at myself because I knew I wasnt ready for this struggle. Well...I set it on the floor when Taysen wasnt looking so he could find it for hisself. I didnt want him knowing I killed it! Haha...anyhow, he finds it in record time, and brings it to me all sad..."Ici ouchie" and "Ici bote" (broke) lol...it was so adorable and cruel at the same time. I felt so bad for the kid, but he has to drop the binky sometime this lifetime! So anyways, for the next couple of hours he reminded me endlessly that his binky had an ouchie and that it was broken, over and over and over again. Saturday afternoon after his nap and while he wasnt watching I trimmed the tip, because he still wanted to keep it his mouth, just not sucking it, but holding it in with his teeth. He still took it to bed, but couldnt barely keep it in his mouth because the nub was so short. Finally sunday morning when he woke up, I scooped up the bink and put it in my pocket...then into a drawer in my room for him to see when he is 30 and I am telling him this story. LOL. He has sucsessfully gone two full days and two full sleeps without his binky! He asked for it last night when he went to bed, but I reminded him that it was broken, and he dropped the issue. :) He has been so great, no tantrums, no whining, nothing. Its like he never had it. So the long love of Binky is finally over!!! :) (And yes, we have been limiting Rowan to hers, just because we dont want it around to tempt Taysen in any way! Haha...she is strictly only allowed her binky at nap and bedtime now. And with Rowan, she seriously could care less, she screams whether or not its plugging her mouth. LOL...and really, it may make it easier to get rid of when she is a little older too. I've actually been thinking about getting rid of hers now too totally, but not sure if thats right or wrong...like for sleeping...does she still need that sucking? I dont want to be mean, she is just a baby still...well somewhat. Haha...any insight girls??)

Anyhow so I guess thats it for now...no other big news. :) Hope youre all doing well! :D

The pics. :)

Ok these are just the proofs. :) They havent been edited yet...(Josh's foot will be cut out of the one of the kids together...Tate's dark one will be lightened. Stuff like that...:) ) Pics didnt go so well this time around. LOL...Taysen wanted nothing to do with getting them done! Wednesday Kris (my close friend and photographer) came over to our house and got some shots of the kids...Tate wasnt happy...(see pic of kids together. LOL...he would NOT smile for me...but thats the best we could get, and its ok with me...haha) Anyhow then thursday night I cut his hair. Then Kris called me and sent me a couple proofs of the good ones, but there was nothing of Tate alone that was great, so we met again on Saturday morning at a park....hence his different hair style. LOL! Anyhow, he was the same and didnt want to do anything but pace around. Soooo finally about 2 minutes before we gave up, Kris started chasing him and playing tag and then he started smiling and running away and to her...so his shots are all of him being goofy with her...and they turned out the best!! :) Anyhow...the pic of the two kids on the bench is hilarious...Taysen wanted nothing to do with a together shot, and he was screaming and mad, then when I saw these pics, it totally cracked me up and Im ordering it! They look like they are both thinking "Dont touch me! What are you looking at!!" Haha...sibling rivalry at such an early age! LOL! :) Ok...well thats it for now! I hope you like them...remember tho, they aren't edited! :)

Its been a while.

So I know its been a while since I have posted. :) Sorry!

Updates Updates! :)

Taysen is doing extremely well since he got his tubes put in! He is starting to really put together some sentences and we are starting to actually understand what he is saying. :) He says "I want" like twenty million times a day now. Whether its "Iwan juuuiceeyyyy" or "Iwan Ici!" (Ici is what he calls his Binky...we can even get him to say "Buh" and "Keys" but then when you say "Say BINKY" he still says with all his might "IICCCIII" LOL...anyhow, he is wanting things all day long. :) He is starting to learn his colors, we just started really working on them tonite with flashcards, and he will match toy fruits and veggies with the color on the card. Like grapes on purple and a tomato on red...we thought he was doing really great for the first night we really tried at least! :) Anyhow...he now will tell us when he poops. :) Yay...isnt that sweet. :) He comes up to me and says "MomMom I poots" LOL...yes he calls me MomMom...its so cute! Unless he is yelling at me...which is often. Then Im just MOM! Haha...anyhow I love that he is starting to talk so much, and even though I know his problems are far from over and probably will never be totally over, but at least this is a start. He makes me so proud when he walks out of speech therapy and you can hear him coming down the hall back into the waiting room talking about me...and then when he walks in he says "HI Mom!" And all the old people in the waiting room waiting for their turn for physical therapy are Awwing him and Im all...yep thats my boy! :) Its so stinkin' adorable I could cry everytime. :) I just dont know what I would do without that kid...he is my heart thats for sure. :)

On to Rowie...:) Now that her cast is off, I had been freaking out about her because she is now officially a year old and she wasn't even showing an interest in crawling/getting around. Granted she had a cast on for a good 7-8 weeks but I still freak out about everything especially since if you have one kid with Autistic tendencies, you have like a 10-15% chance of your other children having it also. Anyhow, like 2 days later Rowan finally started crawling!!! Thank God! Its the army crawl, but at least its something!!! But Rowan is always doing a hand thing, opening and closing her hands, mostly in excitement, her hands and feet are always going. Her hands just open and close constantly, she doesnt do it on purpose, she just does it. But like I said, her feet go at the same time, just moving to the same beat of her hands...so I freak out a little. I just wish she would stop it. I know I am just a paranoid mommy because of our situation, but if she would stop that one thing I would be happy! She is babbling like crazy, so I dont think she will be speech delayed like Taysen is. She doesnt really do any other weird things other than the hand/feet thing, so Im not too worried. Last week on thursday Taysen's caseworker for Help Me Grow was here for a meeting about him, and she watched her a little and she said its nothing to be worried about yet, and that we should give her a little time on the crawling/walking since she did break her leg. Anyhow, she said that if there is anything at all going on with Rowan, it will be caught early and we will get her into any and all the therapies she will need if she needs them. It just sucks to even have to worry...but it just comes with the territory when you already have one child with problems.

I ordered the book The Elephant in the Playroom tonite, I am looking forward to getting it. I have been having a rough time lately when it comes to my kids and thinking about everything and worrying and it just gets overwhelming sometimes. I just dont understand why my child has to have something wrong with him. Its not fair, ya know? Why? We arent bad people. We did everything that you are supposed to do when you get pregnant and have your child. We do everything that we can to do right by our children and its just not fair...ya know? I just dont get it sometimes and I take it personal. Its hard not to, right? I know I could have it worse, but its hard to look at it that way when you are toting your kid to appointments almost every day of the week most weeks. Its just exhuasting and makes you want to just shut the world out and keep inside so we dont have to deal with it and see all the normal kids who are progressing oh so perfectly...It just sucks...oh well...enough whining I guess. Sorry Im a buzz kill sometimes guys!!

Anyhow...Taysen has a meeting to get transitioned out of Early Intervention and into our local Preschool. Thats exciting. Im happy for him but a little scared of how he is going to take the change. Preschool is 2 full days here. Right now, he does EI for 2 hours twice a week.

Today we got new professional pics of the kids. My adorable son wouldnt cooperate for crap. He just wanted to pace up and down the garden and trees and wouldnt sit down next to his sister for anything. I finally called my friend who lives down the street and asked her if I could use her yard (she has a nice pond with a dock) so that we could get some pics of Taysen throwing rocks into the water, because thats better than pics of him pacing. Hopefully we got a couple decent shots. I wont know for a day or two. Rowan did great smiling wise, but she kept putting everything in her mouth...sand, rocks, sticks, grass...even a piece of bird poop!! I was so disgusted! I prayed and prayed for a child who would eat anything and I sure got one. *barfs*

Oh and Rowan is ONE today!! :) Isnt that crazy!! I hope some of the pics turn out nice. I cant wait to post them. I cant wait to see them first though!!! LOL! OK I guess thats it for now...Im sorry if I whined through 90% of this!!